Archive for July, 2008
[08 Jul 2008 | Tuesday]
I was selling this house to this family who didn’t speak English and something was wrong w/my nose piercing the hole was just his huge flapping thing so one of the sons took me into his medical-looking workshop and he said he’d put something in there so it wouldn’t close up all the way but instead he had some weird gummy substance that he was injecting into my face which really confused me and there was blood all over the floor so I was getting really nauseous and the next thing I remember I went to take a shower and there were no shower curtains and our friend Byron walked in with a bunch of people and they all see me naked and I found a scratchy towel to dry off with and all of a sudden it’s a few days later and my parents are there and they’re saying “it’s going to be okay but they’re suing you” because they thought I would sue them because their son messed up my face and that I should’ve known better because I had Biology knowledge and the dad who didn’t even know English said I had told him I had been offered a teaching job teaching Biology so their argument was I should have known better so then a whole class of lawyers appears and they start asking me crazy questions and they were all really young and attractive and they’re cross-examining me and I have no idea what’s going on and then it’s the next day and the lawyers decided I wasn’t guilty but they were doing training games for something and while we were distracted they took all of our suitcases away and in order to get it back we had to win the competition but the thing was I wasn’t even in the class so these people in the class won and they got this weird huge puffy white jackets and they were really excited by it and there’s this one chick who didn’t want the jacket she wanted her suitcase back because she turned into Jamie Presley and she was on the SAG Emmy Nominating board and the reason she had to get her suitcase back was because she had a bunch of really rare unreleased movies so ethically she needed it back but I couldn’t get mine back either and it was my big green one with all my new clothes. Then I’m sitting next to a fire and a cobra comes slinking by sees me sitting next to the fire and strikes my arm for no reason in the crook of my right elbow so then I’m peeling it off with my other fingers and it kind of gave up and released its jaws and then I’m walking down the street and there’s another cobra even bigger and it the exact same thing different arm and I’m prying and prying and ever time I get a fang out it pricks through my other fingers and bites through and grinds in deeper and then I passed out or died and woke up. Weird.